neuroticgirl's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- who I was? ugh! I wrote this ridiculous creative writing essay for a contest about summing up the current (maybe a bit older) generation of girls. I won the contest and was really excited a while back when I won it. I just re-read my paper. Oh my god it sucked. I'm somewhat appalled that I could win with something as awful as this. The essay could be written in any old style and the rules of grammar were not strictly enforced, the only "rule" was that it had to answer the question "who am I?" Damn this paper sucks. I'm gonna post it anyway because I think maybe I like humiliation and maybe it'll remind me of how far I've come when I look at new essays that I've done. Or maybe the new essays that I've done will look just as awful to me in a year or so. Anyway, on with the essay. Who Am I? What a simple question for such a complicated answer. I'm the biggest bitch that you'll ever meet but also the sweetest girl that you could ever imagine. I'm quirky and insane but also traditional and logical. I'm usually happy but almost always sad. It doesn't make a difference, I cry all the time either way. I'm vulnerable but not really. I'm sarcastic, cynical, and scathing yet I like to think that I'm benevolent. I can't bear to be around dull people but I may be the most apathetic person alive. The best advice I've ever received came from a Magic 8 Ball. I'm flippant and indecisive yet I know where I stand on most important matters. I hate to be hurt but apparently enjoy hurting myself. I'm an adult but not. What I want more than anything is to be remembered, but please don't notice me. I love to read because it takes me to places that I don't have the courage to go to in the real world. I have an entire world in my head that I expect everyone to know the rules of and adhere to them, but I continually lose the rule book. I'm a silly putty aficionado. I am consistently, incessantly, eternally, thought of as a friend but never a lover. I wear my heart on my sleeve while trying to look nonchalant and insouciant. I can always find admirable traits in others but usually just don't feel like looking. In a nutshell, I'm me, an original unique person with original, unique thoughts and ideas, just like everyone else. So there it is. I can picture random granola type hippie girls hanging out at the cafe on poetry night gesticulating wildly while reading such horseshit. gag. 7:53 p.m. - 3.12.01 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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