neuroticgirl's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I feel guilty Exactly 3 weeks left until my due date. 21 days. And my mother still lives here. She waited so long to look for an apartment that all the ones that she DOES find aren't available until April. Which isn't ok. Let's go through a run down. When she moved here in May she was only going to stay a month, maybe 2. Which, after 3 months, turned into "I'll be out by December." Which, in December, turned into "I'll be out by January." Which then turned into February 1st. Then the last weekend in February. Then the first weekend in March. And now it's April. No. I would like to get that room ready for the baby. Right now we have baby shit piled in every corner of the house. The bassinets in our room, the stroller in a corner of the living room, other things spread all over the place, the crib, the playpen, the changing table, the baby's dresser, clothes everywhere, toys piling up all over the place. I'm sick of the house being all cluttered up, I'm sick of not being able to sit in the nursery and well, just sit there. I haven't been able to just kick her out. Yet. And she realizes that her time is up, it's past being up. So she found an apartment and she'll find out today when she can move into it. She told me that if it's too long she'll move in with her psuedo-boyfriend until it becomes available. And I'm going to let her. Usually I wouldn't let her because I'd feel bad. I'd feel like she's already here and what sense would it make for her to move just so she could move again in a week or two. But I'd like to renovate that room. I'd like for the baby to actually have a room to come home to. Am I being mean? I mean, should I feel guilty? Because truth be known, I do. Terribly guilty. 1:40 p.m. - 03.04.02 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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